My Father Has Bipolar and Refuses Care (by Anonymous)

May 2, 2006 · Filed Under Member Posts 

Please Note: This was originally posted in my Blogger Blog on Tuesday, May 02, 2006 10:28:01

Jerry, I am curious as to how you and your family ensure that your brother gets the care he needs.

My father is Bi-Polar, and at one time was stable and doing well. However, now in his old age he refuses medication/care and no one(brothers and sister) will support me in helping him. I am a psychotherapist myself and know that he has the disorder, but am not sure how to help.

Do you petition a person the hospital?

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One Response to “My Father Has Bipolar and Refuses Care (by Anonymous)”

  1. Jerry Wipf on January 19th, 2007 3:52 am

    Dear Anonymous

    Unfortunately the breaking point with my brother was when something extremely dramatic happened and I had to have the police come and admit him to a mental hospital.

    It was there where my act-of-love got us the answer we so desperately needed.

    We figured out that he had Bi-Polar. (yes it got so bad that an act-of-love which amounted to a jail sentence changed my brothers life)

    Basically the outside interference shocked my brother into treatment.

    He knew he needed help. It became a matter of life and death. After he came out of the hospital he was fine for about 2 days. The pills they gave him then wore of and we were back to square 1.

    He physically attacked me and I had to have him arrested. This time it was even worse. The police took him to the local detention center and placed him in solitary confinement, thinking he was insane. Having my brother arrested in front of my own eyes hurt so bad but it was the only choice I had. To see a loved one in front of you in shackles and chains and shaking from the meds he was on was heartbreaking. (They let me visit him once a week only between 4-5PM ..Thursdays only) To make a long story short he spent close to 2 months in solitary confinement due to the police thinking he was insane. It was my constant phone calls to the jail that finally made them seek other options. It was then that they brought in a mental health adviser after about the 50th phone call on the third day, and they finally figured out that he had full blown bipolar.

    They started him out on 3 different medications and to this day he is doing fine. I am not saying he is doing great because for a Bipolar to do great each and every day is absolutely not possible. They have their days and we as a family have to accept that.

    As far as your dad is concerned I am 100% with you. Your dad is older than my brother obviously and there is probably more pride at stake then in my brothers case. He probably feels he does not need any help from anybody at this point in his life. Please be understanding with him.

    Find a local bipolar support group or your local mental health center. Make a appointment and make it appear like it is a routine checkup. I am very fortunate as in my area there is a clinic that specializes in everything so we did not single out a mental health clinic when it comes to follow up appointments. I repeat. Please be patient. My brother was on the verge of a life threatening, and potentially deadly decision and if he can overcome it anyone can.

    There is tons more to the story including how I was the only sibling that could help or that was stubborn enough to fail to believe that he was just a rebel. I have 6 other brothers and sisters and my parents as well as many many extended family members. But yet I was the one chosen by a higher power to seek help for my brother. My family is so supportive of all this now as they now know that he has Bipolar.

    Something horrible had to happen for him to wake up and that is why I feel he takes his meds daily.

    Of course there is a family member close by who watches him on a daily basis and makes sure if he skips a day he is KINDLY reminded to take his meds.

    I say you and your family need to sit down without your dad and discuss this letter. Please my friend, I am asking those of your family members who just shrug of their dads condition to reconsider. This Bipolar condition that your loved one has is very painful if not treated. Emotionally it is so hard on all of us. Please help your DAD. Just be very careful how you approach it. Seek out a health-care professional in your area ASAP.

    My brothers story is extremely dramatic and has a lot more detail…

    This is a day to day experience but thanks to my brothers dedication not to let loved ones suffer any longer (and trust me some days he forgets that as well) it is well worth the effort.

    I am 100% with you my friend. Please let me know how your dad is doing.

    Love And Concern
    Jerry Wipf

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